A Mother's Love

I had a thought today - there are so many songs and stories about a mother's relationship with her daughter, a father's relationship with his daughter - and I can't bring anything to mind about a parent's love for the son. Why is that, I wonder? It doesn't make sense to me. I guess that I just need to write something, which I will once I have my brain back.

I held Sebastian on my lap tonight as he fell asleep. He's always so active and crazy and running around. I don't get much of an opportunity to hold him. I looked at his face as he slept and just melted with love for him. He looked so peaceful and angelic and beautiful. He can be such a brat sometimes, but it's really that he's strong willed and stubborn and knows his mind. He's a tough one and I love his strong personality. He's also a tender hearted, sensitive little love. He loves his sister. I love watching him with her - he'll randomly come over and stroke her hair, hold her hand, make her smile and laugh. He really can't leave her alone. Even after he told me he doesn't like her anymore (silly kiddo), he was hugging and snuggling her minutes later.

I love my little boy so much. He's growing up so fast. Today, we went to a park and played. I watched him running around and it was like he was flashing between my baby boy and a big kid. Watching him run is so adorable. He's so earnest and intent. The past 3 1/2 years have just flown by. I feel like he's growing faster than I can handle. I'm understanding so much more what my parents went through - the worrying, the aching, the anxiety - and he's not even a teenager yet.

He told me today that I'm his best friend and asked me if he is my best friend. I told him yes and that he will always be my favorite Sebastian. He interrupted his play a number of times to run over and hug me and tell me how much he loves me. No matter what else he does, those moments tell me I'm doing it right. I love this little boy so much more than I ever thought possible.

Promises, Promises

Sebastian promised me tonight that he will always be my Baby Boo. I'm holding him to that.

Sebastian says the darndest things...

Yesterday, we were watching TV, just kicking back, and a commercial came on for Christmas trees and ornaments. Sebastian looked at me and said "We take spiders off and put up Christmas?" Yes, I giggled. I guess it's now time to take Halloween down and start Christmas decorating. Thanks to Sebastian and his 3 year old obsessions, we'll be doing it up right and purty this year, I think.

Also, last night we had our first "big boy pants EPIC FAIL!!!!" Heh. I know it was bound to happen, but oh man! The boy child decided he wanted to wear his Hulk big boy pants, so we took his diaper off and put a pair of his Hulk underwear on. About 15 min later, he wet himself. Not surprising. He wanted another pair on, so I pulled out a pair of Cars underwear that a friend sent us. He was doing well, even went so far as to go poop in his potty chair. yay! I was thrilled. About half an hour after putting the pants on, though, he came in and told me he had peed. Ok. no biggie, right? wrong. he had also pooped BIG TIME in the pants. So, I have him laying down and am pulling the pants down - he kicks his legs and I end up with the poop ALL over me.

Never let it be said that being a mommy is glamorous work. heh heh It's awesome that he is working on the potty training, though. He is going at his own pace and I think we'll have some great success with him getting potty trained. I'm so glad he's finally showing interest in his big pants instead of freaking out when we pulled them out.

Aaaand - he just told me his butt burped. *sigh* Boys.

I guess it's past time for an update

I'm really terrible at this, I'll admit. I'm always thinking about things I could write about, but the effort that it takes to sit down and write seems insurmountable. I just need to suck it up and work on it.

Anyway, I am 33 weeks along, the baby girl is finally head down where she should be and I'm anxious to get going. This has been a difficult pregnancy and I'm a bit on the impatient side. I can't wait to have my little girl here and to meet her and see if I'm right about her personality. She's acting just like Sebastian did, so I'm tempted to say I'll have two of the same peas in a pod - which scares me to death, but thrills me to bits at the same time.

Sebastian is growing and changing so quickly. I am utterly amazed watching him every day. It makes me sad that I am so heavy and hurting and can't play with him the way I was before I got pregnant. I love the time we have together. He's such an awesome kiddo. So smart and fantastic. I love listening to him and the things that come out of his mouth. As much as 3 is driving me crazy, it's so much fun at the same time. 

Every night, he insists that I put him to bed and sing our songs. Our songs are Twinkle Twinkle Little Star, Itsy Bitsy Spider, Baa Baa Black Sheep, and Give Said the Little Stream. He sings along with me and does little hand movements. He has also started making up his own words to the tunes and will sing on his own, while he's playing. I love listening to him pretend and make up stories. Right now, he's obsessed with Wonder Pets and Backyardigans and soccer, so most of his stories revolve around those things. Chad has been spoiling him rotten, which I love, ad has fully outfitted him with soccer gear and Wonder Pets toys. I really need to go through his room and get rid of all the stuff he no longer plays with to make room for all the new stuff. heh I actually have a pretty solid idea for how I want to do his room, but I just need the energy to do it. I hope I can get it done before the baby gets here.

As far as the house goes - oh man. I am a terrible housekeeper and have no problem admitting it. I'm hoping that I can get this latest little setback taken care of so I can get my house done before the baby gets here. Interesting that I was saying pretty much the same thing during my pregnancy with Sebastian at about the same time. I guess the super nesting is kicking in. I swear on all that is holy that I *will* have my house in the order I want it before the baby gets here. Who knows? Maybe doing that will help me go into labor - if I can keep my back from getting stupid!

Anyway, that's all I have for now. I'll try to throw up some of the latest pictures of my bugaboo in the next few days. I just need to get them off my phone.

Sebastian and his birthday and mid week naps

I am really really tired right now so this is all you get for the time being.

Nap time hit on the couch on Wednesday afternoon. I LOVED having him curled up next to me, sleeping so soundly and sweetly.


He played basketball in the living room for over 8 hours today - while watching Space Jam the whole time. I had such a blast watching him and throwing the ball with him today.

Sebastian's traumatic haircut

These first two were taken yesterday morning before he got ready to go to the sitter. I was lulling him into a false sense of security.


This is one of his latest things to do. It's how he looks closely at things.

Sitting at Cookie Cutter's, in a little red roadster and watching Sponge Bob.

This is the aftermath. I accidentally deleted the one of him screaming like a monster. He was NOT happy with me. This is also what happens when you let someone you don't know and trust near your child with scissors and clippers.

At this face, I was worried that not even Jamba Juice would get him to forgive me.

I shouldn't have worried. Jamba Juice and some mommy loves take care of everything.

Coming soon: On another journal, I have started a log of posts titled The Mommy Diaries. In the near future, I will be moving all of those over here to share. My original thought was to just document life as a mom. However, Sebastian has provided me with so much material, this may end up flourishing into a full fledged series of short stories at some point. Now that I'm not working, I just might be able to get this done.

Whoops!

I really need to be better about updating here. I just haven't been much in the mood to write.

I worked from home today because I was feeling monstrously ill when I woke up. As a result, the monkey stayed home with me. I've caught myself looking at him many times today and just watching his movements and reactions. He is SUCH a little boy now. Most of the last vestiges of babyhood are gone, relegated to nostalgic memories. Part of me really does want to keep him little and young. He's so beautiful and innocent and untouched by the ugliness the world has to offer. All I can do is keep enjoying each moment while it's happening.

Speaking of sweet moments, a week or so ago, I had him in bed with me because he was having a bad night. He scooted over to be on my pillow with me and framed my face with his little hands and said "love you mommy", before he drifted off to sleep.

I am also alternately amused and irritated by his tendency to grab me from behind, stick his head between my legs and pretend he's giving me a piggyback ride. It's so cute and silly and so annoying at the same time. I'll have to break him of that before I get too big, or he'll knock me off balance.

I can't wait to see how he is with the baby. He LOVES babies and doesn't get jealous when I'm playing with other kids. I think he'll be an amazing and loving big brother. I'll just ned to be very aware about making sure that I'm giving him lots of love and attention so he doesn't feel displaced.

This parenting thing is always a constant adventure.

And a Picture Post...

The boy loves his daddy

Yet once again, Sebastian proves he is a monkey

I love what happens when Sebastian gets hold of the camera

Sebastian's self portrait

This is a sight we don't get to see very often. I love it.

Nothing much to say

So here are some pictures of the boy to enjoy:


His new hiding place
Falling asleep with the light on

Sebastian discovers the joy of oreos
Christmas morning in his new cars chair
Kicking it all cool-like
My baby isn't much of a baby anymore
Hey Papa, he's getting creative with all the uses of his DuPlo wagon
At least he didn't pull all the sheets out ....................... this time

The Plague - I'm not dead yet!

I meant to post this on Saturday, but my computer got dumb. So, here it is with no pictures. I will be posting pictures later.
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I meant to update this yesterday, but I've been somewhat out of sorts this weekend. Sebastian and I seem to have caught the Black Plague. I am so glad he has learned to share so well. I'm actually thinking it's possible we picked it up at the ER either when he got his stitches, or when he got them removed, since we're both on about the same time line. I feel so bad with his little cough. hot water and honey to be doing him a world of good, though.

Anyway, his eye looks fantastic. It's healed into a nice tiny little scar that looks more like a cat scratch than anything. I have pictures to upload, but either my camera, or my computer is being stupid and my camera isn't being recognized right now.

Aside from the sickness and healing, Sebastian is doing really well. He's a crazy insane little nutball. His latest favorite thing is finding hiding places - tiny little dark cubbyholes where he can hide himself away. In fact, last night, I lost him for about 20 min and wasn't until I heard his voice right behind me did I realize he was hiding in the buffet cupboard. Life and excitement with toddlers.
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Update since Sunday when I started this:

Sebastian and I are still sick, though both on the mend. I am going to give it about a week, see how I'm doing, then decide if this needs something stronger than an OTC med to combat it.

Work has been insane for both Chad and myself. Nothing really more to say on that end.

We're working on getting finances in order and will start getting the house dejunked in readiness for spring, hopefully sooner rather than later. I am excited to do a full purge and get my head into a better space. It will also be nice to be organized and clean and have an adult space.

Initiation

In my mind, there is no better way to christen a new blog, especially a new blog about my family's tales and adventures, than with the tale I have to share with you tonight.

As you may, or may not, know, I have been cursed blessed with an abominable, insane, crazy, stubborn, head-strong absolutely adorably intelligent and active toddler. This child is my life, my reason for living, and will probably be responsible for putting me into an early grave. He's almost impossible to keep up with. I have never felt my age so much as I have since he hit the toddler stage. At the same time, he is sweet and loving and cuddly - and he knows it. He manipulates me with his cuteness so I don't wring his neck.

Anyway, on to the story of how I spent my Saturday night.

It started out in a rather unassuming manner. I was sitting on the love seat, crocheting a project I need to finish this weekend. Sebastian was watching Toy Story and dancing around the living room with his adorable plushie penguin Melissa's folks gave him for Christmas. Chad had just finished getting ready for his show and was standing next to the couch. Sebastian, who loves his daddy and loves any opportunity to show off for him that he can, got a wild hair and started twirling around like a whirling dervish.

Next thing we knew, Sebastian had tripped and gone head first into the corner of the coffee table. Chad grabbed him and laid him on the couch, while I dove off my seat and over to the baby. He had smacked his head right above his left eye and got a pretty good cut. Plus, being a head wound, it was bleeding like mad. I grabbed some tissue and put pressure on it to get the bleeding to stop, then took a look. It was definitely deep and long enough that it was going to need stitches.

We bundled the boy up, grabbed Chad's gear and it was off to the ER. Because Chad's band was playing in a competition, I refused to let him cancel and promised I would keep him up to date on what was going on and dropped him at the club on my way to the ER. I got to Primary's and expected to settle in for a Rip Van Winkle style wait. Instead, I was pleasantly surprised. We got there and were immediately able to check in. Within about 10 min, they had us back in triage to assess the situation. Right from there, we were put in a nice private room and the dr turned on Harry Potter for Sebastian while the nurse brought him some toys to play with. About 15 min after that, the nurse came back to check his vitals and to put a topical lidocain solution on his cut to numb it so they wouldn't have to give him a shot. I wish I'd had the camera with me at that point. He looked like a little pirate. The nurse had put a lidocaine soaked cotton ball on the cut and wrapped the equivalent of vet wrap around it and his head to hold it in place. He fought with it at first, but was soon distracted by the movie and trucks.

It took about an hour for them to come back in to check on us, but we were doing just fine. When the doctor came back in, she declared it was time for her to wrangle the troops and get Sebastian stitched up. Here is where I felt totally and completely helpless. They put his arms into a pillowcase, then laid him down on top of that. He was then wrapped up in a sheet like a burrito so he couldn't move. He was screaming to bring the house down and all I could do was rub his tummy and sing to him, hoping that some measure of that was comforting to him. I hated that I couldn't take away the fear and frustration he was feeling, also knowing that he was tired and confused. Poor Chad called while we were in the middle of the stitching process and I couldn't come to the phone.

The actual process went pretty quickly. it took about 5 minutes for the doctor to place 4 stitches. Sebastian was unwrapped and I cuddled and kissed him while he shuddered and cried. It was amazing how quickly the tears dried up, though, when the doctor brought him a popsicle - totally and completely - if you didn't know he had been crying hysterically, you would never have known he had shed a tear.

Our total time at the hospital was about an hour and 45 minutes - practically unheard of. I was so happy with the whole experience. I hope we never have to deal with it again, but I'm glad to know that it won't be too horrible an experience, should we have to. On the way home, I swung by so that Chad could see the boy and the boy could see his daddy. I just love watching the two of them interact. Sebastian got sooo excited when he saw Chad. I thought he was going to pop his new stitches.

When we got home, it was like nothing had happened. Sebastian was running around, jumping on the couch, being his usual crazy self. I was envisioning another run to the hospital because of him bursting his stitches, or some such. After a little while though, he settled down and cuddled into me while we watched Toy Story. Poor little monkey head. I certainly do love him to distraction.

Anyway, so this isn't all boring text, I'll include a few pictures I took of his new decoration. The blue hat he's wearing is a hat I made him from bamboo yarn. He'd probably sleep in it if I let him.